All is beautiful and all is fair..

"torn between two conflicting worlds,
the heart and the mind.."

Life's a struggle-to fence, face and fight..
a battle that everyone has to fight for himself.

Life is that ultimate battlefield where we are all alone..
where every other feeling fades away.. except the lust to survive.

But I say it's fair.
Downright Brutal. Naked. But fair..
It's a fairground.. [you win some. you lose some.]

What bothers me.. is a thought. I wonder sometimes, in solitude.. in thought.. whether it's all worth it? I wonder in that defeaning silence, how a soldier feels.. waging a war against an army for reasons that concern him not.. killing people he knows not..? How must be the night of that soldier whose victory is someone's death.. someone whom he never hated.. because he never knew..? What is his prayer to God every night?

I believe, our lives are shadows of these men because somewhere along we are all fighting battles in life. Sometimes for ourselves.. sometimes for no reason. What is disparaging, dishearting is the strike of the thought that we are all really alone and it's not because it's meant to be, but because we have distanced ourselves.. from each other, from our own souls, from God..

It is painful, I agree, to be alone in the crowd. But it must be worse to be among friends and not know how many are true. The count does not matter, but one would be lying if he says that it doesn't weaken him from within to know that some moments that touched his heart where all a lie. Some part of his life was not actually what it seemed to him. Now that's what I call is losing a battle.. a torment for the heart. To believe in something so good.. without realising that it was too good to be true.

I wish sometimes to say that it's unfair. That life's unfair. Cruel, Brutal and Unfair.
But just when these thoughts enter my mind, God reminds me of my blessings in the image of my angels.. the ones he has send for all of us. So what if it's rough, so what if it's crude.. beautiful it is too.
..But life isn't a battle against anyone else. It's a struggle to be better, not than anyone else, but better than our previous selves. Our purpose is to grow, by every breath we breathe.. and so must grow our love, for without compassion .. without companions [the angels the Lord sent for us] in this world we are all alone.

"Betwixt the sufferings, the sorrows, the failures and the frowns.. may our hearts always believe that in His kingdom all is beautiful and all is fair.."